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a collection of what goes on in my mind at night.

Nine Blank Pages


You never think you're going to see something weird at a crosswalk. But I did. It was more scary than weird.

I walked up to you. I didn't recognise it was you lying on your back in the middle of the street, but I was still scared. And when I realized it was you, I was even more worried. So I did the first thing that comes to a rational person's mind when they see someone on the ground and asked if you were okay. And instead of trying to get up, you spoke.

"Noelle, it's happening. It happened to my friends, my family, my friends of my family, and now it's happening to me."

You stood up without struggle.

"My dreams are turning real."

I tried to find something to say in the midst of my confusion, but as I was thinking ... you fainted. Right there, on the pavement, you were lying down again. And you did not look like you were having a pleasant sleep.


You walked up to me from behind. You were supposed to be in bed. You needed your rest.

"Holy shit, Noelle," I heard you say. I turn around.

"What is it?"

"I only have nine days left to live."

Another extremely confusing and scary moment. What the hell did you mean by that?

You handed me a small fat book you were holding. I got really confused, but as I looked at you I realized I didn't know what to say anyway, so I just opened it.

Inside the book, on every page, was a small summary of every single day of your life. Mostly bullet points. Some small paragraphs. But still extremely strange.

I skimmed the pages, and got near the end, where there was still some writing. There were blank pages at the end - but only nine. Nine blank pages left.

I felt your arms wrap around me as I held the book close to my chest and sobbed.